Hello and welcome to the first episode of the Away with Sad series, where I try and do things I need to do and hopefully become happier in the process!
Today I decided to do something I've never done before...bake bread! I know a LOOOOT of people already got to experiment with bread during Covid. Being able to take time away from work (or forced, rather) and make you're own sourdough starters was something I envied. Unfortunately, I worked a blue collar job during Covid, so I only was able to drink a bunch and play MMOs. Those were my saving grace! Because of that, I never had the energy to even think about baking bread. Luckily, I received a wonderful cookbook from my Aunt for a wedding gift (from 3 years ago..I know, LONG TIME) and I am finally putting it to good use! She is so lovely. She put in her favorite bread recipes - she's a killer bread baker...and that's it. (Sorry Aunt Barb..you can't cook for shit..Love you!) You could say that baking bread is her "bread and butter".
I decided that I wanted to make Baguettes! 
(Let me know if you need me to decipher it for ya lol)
Let's get to kneading!
It is so me to want to do something without fully seeing if I have all of the ingredients. I haven't thought about making bread since she first gave this to me (again...3 years ago). This recipe does not need a lot, but I definitely didn't have bread flour or yeast. I must have thrown them away when I was tired of looking at them in my pantry.
Regardless! I want to bake something. So I pulled out my trusty baking book and grabbed my beautiful cat to see what we could make instead. I was thinking of doing chocolate chip cookies, since those are always killer. I started flipping through the pages to see what there was and low and behold, I found book yeast!!!!! Yes, you read that correctly, I found a slightly opened package of active yeast in the book! It must of been from when I wanted to try this when I got married.
This was a sign! I must make the baguettes regardless of not having bread flour! I've seen people do it before, so of course it's possible! Back to the bread!
I grabbed all the things I needed and started to mix. I added the flour, salt and yeast.
Now, is it just me, or does yeast look like mini maggots or meal worms? Like if you stare at it too long, they start squirming around! Creeeeeeeeepy.
After I mixed that all together, it was time to add the oil and water. Now, this recipe is very straight forward - felt sort of like a technical that Paul Hollywood made. It just said to knead for 10 minutes. I was confident that I could do this so I went to work! Immediately, it felt too sticky. I stuck to it though (much like the dough did to all my digits) and kneaded for about 4 minutes...then I remembered. I have a freaking kitchenaid! SO I said screw it to the old fashioned way (I am disabled after all and my wrist was starting to really feel the pain) and threw that dough into the kichenaid for another 6 minutes.
After it was done, it still looked really sticky, but I was trusting the process. Next step - put it in a oiled bowl and cover for 1.5 hours.
Once the time was up, I lifted the cover and low and behold... it looked exactly the same. No rise whatsoever....but that didn't deter me! I was determined to complete this journey regardless of the outcome! So next I had to split it into three sections and roll them into logs.
This went horribly. In my head, I knew I should have used flour on my counter to make it actually possible to form any sort of shape with this dough. But for some reason, I wanted to fully stick to the recipe (much like the dough to my counter and hands) and it didn't say to...
Somehow, I managed to make three completely different sized logs and added them to a cake pan (turns out I got rid of my baguette pan along with the bread flour and other yeast). With all three logs slightly formed in the oil pan, I covered it and waited another hour for them to rise.
It was time to reveal the logs and see if they had risen at all! Drum roll please.......
They didn't rise at all. At this point I figured that the secret book yeast was probably bad. I still didn't care though. I was going to finish this no matter what the outcome would be! I cut three slits into each log (also didn't really work since it was still sticky, but it's the thought that counts right?) and inserted them into the oven. After 25 minutes, it was time to reveal the loaves!
These were some of the saddest baguettes I have ever seen in my entire life. Totally flat, not holding shape, but they were bread, baked and mine.
I took a bite to see how they tasted regardless of the failure in proofing them....they were horrible. My husband said they tasted like pasta that isn't fully cooked through..I agreed.
Regardless of this massive failure, there was a huge success in actually following through with this project! I was pleased and actually a little happy because I was actually able to do something that I said I was going to do, especially since I have never done it before. It felt good to follow through. And hey, maybe they weren't edible, but I could make a tiny baguette house out of them, or a door stop. Anything is possible if your use your imagination!
This was a great first day of my Away with Sad series. I felt accomplished and ready for the next project that hopefully will be a little more successful than this! Onto the next...what will I do next to bring happiness back into my every day life?